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Why
did she stop emailing me and what should I do?
Dear
Ron,
A
woman started emailing me from Match.com, and we hit it off right
away — or at least I thought. For a week we exchanged about
twenty messages a day. She wrote me full pages about herself. We
didn’t exchange numbers though, and then she stopped emailing
me. I sent her two unanswered messages and never received a reply.
Now it’s been two weeks, and I’m embarrassed about sending
her another note. I don’t want to look desperate. But why would
she just drop off like that? If I send her another note, what should
I say?
Confused
Dear
Confused,
You’ve
likely encountered a routine peccadillo of internet flirting. Every
guy has experienced the same in offline situations with just as
much lingering befuddlement: The babe talks to you enthusiastically
for a half-hour, makes serious eye contact, touches your forearms
and then — poof! — she moseys off and never comes back.
You’re left replaying the video, trying to troubleshoot what
went wrong. The same’s happened here; she tried you out, extracted
the necessary details to satisfy her curiosity, had fun and then
decided to flit away to the next interesting flower.
It’s
very tempting to expect that a flurry of fun, provocative emails
will lead to a phone call and a date, but many people don’t
follow that game plan. They’re very happy to explore compatibility
through written discussions and then move on if they don’t
feel an extraordinary kismet of chemistry with the individual who’s
drooling at the other keyboard.
Look,
a friend of mine — an attractive blonde woman — posted
her free
profile and received exactly 86 emails from men (and a few women)
during the first week. A triumph! An impossible feat! The constraints
of employment and sleep allowed her to start email relationships
with only the most interesting suitors, and among them, only the
few gems have a good shot at seeing Ali in the flesh. So don’t
feel so lousy.
To
put closure on things, send her one last, innocuous “How’s
your week going?” note. If her silence was caused by a freak
bus accident, she’ll be glad to hear from you and will reply
accordingly. If not, you’ll get a polite “No, thanks!”
or no reply at all. That only leaves with thousands of other quality,
single women to contact.
Match
Advice by Ron
© Match.com
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